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Fractured Country Song Titles

THE FUNNIEST SONGS YOU'VE NEVER HEARD

FRACTURED COUNTRY SONG TITLES

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FRACTURED COUNTRY SONG TITLES

I'll tree a squirrel for your love
The only way i can say your name is in vain - Country song title
Your heart is dead in the water - Funniest country song titles
Moonlight over the gun rack - Funny country song titles
God bless mouthwash -  Fractured songs
Sleeping single because your leg hair feels like barbed wire - Country song fractured titles

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ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Garret Mattews

Readers may want to know a little about me.

I was born in 1949 the same day as Bruce Springsteen.

I can juggle an 8-pound bowling ball and two bean bags.

I once jumped out of an airplane, hoping the newspaper byline would help me get women. It didn’t.

I have never had a cup of coffee.

Decades ago, I sold a few jokes to Joan Rivers for five bucks apiece.When I worked for the Bluefield, W.. Va., Daily Telegraph, I wrote about a serpent-handler who had been bitten more than 150 times by poisonous snakes during worship services.

While I have never written a country song, I did pen a one-act play about Hank Williams.

 

I have operated (badly) a jackhammer.

For a column, I walked a guy’s pet lion.

 

I have worked on the business end of a garbage truck.

 

When I started in the newspaper business in 1972, (my pay was $90 a week) I lived for a few months in a boarding house.

 

I wrote a book about kids’ baseball – “Swing, Batta” – that got a nice review in The New York Times.

 

I had a mine owner pull a gun on me during the 1978 coal strike.

 

For a column, I observed a mortician performing an embalming. His assistant never showed up, so I passed the instruments.

 

While walking three laps around the track, I can do 220 pushups.

 

That’s about it.

Bio

ABOUT THE ILLUSTRATOR

Tim Eterno is a cartoonist, illustrator, writer and voice actor hailing from the Chicago suburbs.

An effervescent doodler since childhood, Tim received his B.A. from the College of Communication at Butler University and now produces freelance art and comic strips.

His weekly comic ‘Chip Scripple’ ran for three years in Butler’s student-managed newspaper, The Butler Collegian, and his recent animated short film ‘GARAGE SALE’ has received acclaim online and at several international film festivals.


 

Tim is greatly inspired by achieving impact through simplicity, making the most of every stroke - his art style highlights broad emotions and expressive characters, inspired greatly by American comic strips of the mid-20th century.

 

Tim is currently creating original comics for Nintendo Force Magazine and workshopping an animated series; he is an active member of the National Cartoonists Society and lives in Brooklyn, NY.

 

Check out more of his artwork via @ragtagstuff on Twitter and Instagram.

Tim Eterno - cartoonist, illustrator, writer and voice actor

CONTACT

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